This advice from an expert about what parents should take credit for on Christmas is as true today as it was when her viral plea initially went out two years ago. Megan Dunn, a social worker and Family Court Case Manager in Atlanta, wrote an impassioned Facebook post about heartbroken families who canât afford big ticket items, and pleaded with families to make sure expensive gifts donât come from Santa. Thanks to internet sharing, her post is headed for viral status again this year.
In the post, Dunn explains her reasoning to parents, reminding them that not all families can afford electronics or other expensive gifts. âLittle kids wonder why they got socks or a coat or hand me down toys from Santa and other kids got an iPad. This is the second year Iâve had a parent cry to me telling me that their kid asked if they werenât good enough or if Santa didnât like them as much. Breaks my heart for the parents and the kids.â
Kids have always been told that Santa gives to children whoâve been nice all year, and leaves coal for those whoâve been naughty. Even the most popular Christmas carols tell them so, while traditions like Elf on the Shelf remind them that their behavior is always being monitored. With this in mind, itâs easy to see why young kids might be hurt to think that Santa decided they didnât deserve the same gifts that a friend, cousin, or classmate might have gotten â despite their efforts to be âgood.â
Additionally, kids from low-income families can take a major hit to their self esteem and well-being when comparing notes with other kids about holiday gifts. âPoor kids understand inequality pretty much from birth,â shares Bobbi Dempsey, one self-proclaimed former âpoor kidâ who sometimes got IOUs from Santa as a child. âThey know some parents have more money than others and can afford to buy more expensive gifts. But âSantaâ is not restricted by any such budgetary concerns, so, for kids who believe, his seemingly unfair and inconsistent gift-giving process is harder to grasp.â
Dunn feels that a lot of these negative outcomes could be avoided if parents made sure expensive gifts like iPads, gaming systems and new phones came from parents, and more reasonable gifts came from Santa. That way all kids can feel the Santa love.
Itâs important to note that you donât have to alter your gift list one bit to show empathy to the kids who might not have big-ticket gifts under the tree. Following this suggestion doesnât mean you canât buy your child a pricey gift, if you have the financial resources and desire to do so â it simply means putting your own name on the gift tag instead of St. Nickâs.
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