When parents become the “food police” at home, eating can become a source of stress and guilt for kids and teens.
Between adults’ shame around eating certain foods, all of the talk about ultraprocessed foods, constant ads about weight loss medications, and unrealistic body standards promoted on TV and social media, kids are already getting lots of negative and mixed messages about food and bodies.
An increasing number of kids these days are being diagnosed with disordered eating — and this behavior has been appearing at younger and younger ages, and in kids of all genders and ethnicities, according to pediatrician and family nutrition expert Dr. Reshma Shah, M.D.
Sure, we all want our kids to eat healthy foods, but the focus on wellness and healthy eating can lead some people to an unhealthy extreme. It’s important for families to build in flexibility and room for enjoyment when it comes to food.
Luckily, you can proactively build your family culture to protect against future disordered eating habits! Here are some tips from Dr. Shah and the American Academy of Pediatrics about how to help kids develop a healthy relationship with food:
- Avoid dieting talk around kids.
- Be positive and specific about what food can do for the body (fiber helps with digestion, calcium gives you strong bones).
- Focus on what foods you’re bringing into the house, so you don’t have to be the “food police” at home.
- Let the occasional treats be purely fun without the guilt!
- Expose kids to a variety of fruits, vegetables, and other healthy foods.
- Have regular family meals together, and feed yourself well.
- Don’t talk about your own body or food intake (or anyone else’s) in negative ways.
- Set limits on social media use, and have open discussions about what they’re viewing.
And be sure to talk to your pediatrician if you notice any of these signs of restrictive or disordered eating in your child (which are often seen alongside other signs of distress or anxiety):
- A sense of rigidity around eating, instead of enjoyment
- Changes in food intake, like skipping meals or not finishing meals
- Being secretive about eating
- Stress around food is impacting other areas of their life
